Are Your Kids Old Enough to Be Home Alone?

By Karen Unger

The school year is starting. You're scrambling to put after-school or childcare plans in place when your "tween" daughter tells you that all her friends' moms are letting them stay home alone after school this year. "Why do I still have a babysitter?" she asks. Or worse, she says, "You're making me miserable!"

No Magic Formula

Sound familiar? Like most things with "tweens" and teens, there're no set rules for deciding if your daughter is ready to be home alone. Asking yourself the following questions and talking to your daughter is one way to find out:

• Do you know the legal age a child can be left alone in your community? In most states it is 12 years of age or older, but this does vary. You can call your state's children's protective services agency (look it up online or in the telephone book) to find the answer.



• How mature is she? Children vary in what they are able to handle and in what they fear. Some children can make wise decisions in emergency situations. They don't panic and know how to stay safe. You should know your daughter's comfort level.



• What preparation have you done as a family? Have you practiced fire, tornado, or earthquake drills? Does she know basic first aid? Does she know what to do if there's a power outage or a stranger at the door? Does she know what to say if the phone rings? What if she arrives home and finds the door is open? Teaching your child how to keep herself safe (the Girl Scout program resources at all ages are full of safety information and activities) is the first step. Practicing these safety strategies is the second step.

Although you may worry at first, staying home alone is a normal milestone in your daughter's development. It's a sign—to both of you—that she's growing up.